a spot of sunshine

I'm starting to retreat into my usual break-hiatus again. But since it was my birthday yesterday, I figure this little space of mine could do with something on it.

I...don't know what to say. I wish I could make this a happy post. I had a fabulous time with friends :D and it was lovely. A whole bunch of new books (most of them from myself lol; but thank you for the ones that aren't). Reminders from absent beloved friends of how beloved I still am. But I don't think those are the biggest things I'll be taking away from today, and even if it's not my birthday anymore, today was pretty much yesterday and I will probably forever behold my 20th in a sober light. I'm not down or sad (not much, anyway), but it's been...sobering. Ironic choice of words considering what I was doing the night before ;)

Yeah, if only I read books as fast as I got them.



I started this post earlier yesterday and was going to say something relentlessly optimistic about how good times could be had anytime and birthdays are just an excuse for one. How I was going to take that excuse and run away with it, that bad times don't have to mean the end of it. Well, it's today already, so the persistent cheer is quite unnecessary. I had a good time, despite everything, and because of everything, I can pick up the pieces of my shattered confidence and continue on. (the alternative does not bear considering)  

Mmmm all in all, it was a decently awesome birthday :) Thank you again to all the people who made it so.



"I'll send her a spot of sunshine," he said. "Sometimes a spot of sunshine will show people how dusty and dirty things are, when nothing else will."

-- 'Dame Crabby's Surprise Packet' in The Enchanted Bellows and Other Stories, Enid Blyton